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“Things I thought I had overcome“

I thought I was ok - only when I heard Gregory talking about the rage he felt for his father I started feeling something boiling up from deep within. Things I thought I had overcome, that were now rising to the surface again. Yes, it was painful, but mostly it was a truly liberating experience to share these feelings with my group.

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”Experiences growing up“

I never talked about the violent experiences I had when I was young. As I was getting ready to share my story, I wrote down some bullet points and they brought back all the emotions. I felt them all over again: the anger, the shame but also the pride. I was pretty excited to share it with my group – though I was also kind of nervous and afterwards I thought I might have stuttered a bit or lost the thread.

“A new perspective“

Now it’s happening, something I never thought would be possible: I feel like I am failing. I feel like I lost control of what actually shapes my life’s path, like a puppet that can only react to its outer. Moreover, I do not think of me as depressed, but I do catch myself waking up and thinking “What the h*** is actually happening?” The feeling of getting too old for my job and not having enough experience for a manager position was awful, but my group at Essence encouraged me to look for a completely new job, and that was the best thing to do!

“Just start talking. Then listen. Then think.“

Sometimes I get anxious before sharing something with my group. Other times I get insecure if anyone will relate or if I can make my point clear. The best method that I can recommend: Just start talking. Get it all out, only then you can listen and really reflect it. I feel such a relief every time I just get it over with something I need to share.

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Die Zeit bei Essence ist DEINE Zeit. Du entscheidest worüber du sprechen willst.